Infinitesimal : I’ve Been Assigned New Limits




Infinitesimal :
I’ve Been Assigned New Limits

streams: 

    all I wanted in coordinated blue lights –
    in the absence of flickers,    keep focus
    on the fog    (especially its frequency,
    its ability to fully consume)    I’m awake
    for five hours before I feel the grinding
    of clouds into my bones

    I’m a ghost haunting the spaces between
    naps, I fear my intelligence is spongy,
    unreliable,        I forget everything
    except the fear    that it’s truly
    all over for me & every healthy dream

    how long have I been drowning?
    my arms felt the burning of the burden
thirteen years ago
I begged for a life saver,
but I spoke in too low of a voice

crossover:

    a quick sketch resembling my back –
    once busied, boozing, bustling,
    paper-cut, brittle & beautiful,
    butterfly burnt, moth tongued,
    never motherly, poetic eyes,
    starlet smile,    but you can’t
    see this

    broken, bruised sternum, internal
    pus pools, pained, pregnant with
    genetic defects, parasites, leeches,
    filter-failed, toxic bloodlets,
    declining function, floundering
    fairy feasting upon an inflamed heart

    invisibility    (mostly appreciative
    of this)    no pity, no apologetics,
    no remedies,    no more hope
    in cures or the animated corpses
    who tout them    snake oil soothes
    (that’s what sentiments are)
    easily choked upon declarations
    of empathy –
    these are the rocks in my pockets

succumbed: 

    the level of acceptance
is the bottom of the ocean,
the face you see
when you look up
is your own

Image by Mystic Art Design from Pixabay








Published by Jennifer Patino

Poet.

17 thoughts on “Infinitesimal : I’ve Been Assigned New Limits

  1. “I begged for a live saver,
    but I spoke in too low of a voice”

    And

    “the level of acceptance
    is the bottom of the ocean,
    the face you see
    when you look up
    is your own”

    Utterly brilliant and powerful piece, Jennifer.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. The structure is so perfect for these complex messages. And yeah that invisibility… I’m mostly good with that too, until it comes to the ones who (unfortunately) know and then it’s a relief to be seen. Paradoxes galore. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Heartbreaking poem! Such honest and powerful verse! Your writing here is really impressive Jennifer! It’s like your sub-conscious is freely flowing, but with great craft and sound and meaning! What courage it would have taken to write the last paragraph! This line, ‘the face you see when you look up is your own’ is simply the brave acceptance of everything! Clearly among your best poems!

    Liked by 1 person

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