The Jam Files #13 — “I’m in Love with This Place”

It didn’t take very long. Once we landed in Chicago for a layover I was already feeling like a brand new person. I can’t explain this. When I lived in Vegas I had the worst neuropathy pain ever. I’d wake up pretty much daily feeling like there was glass embedded in my skin & I’d often feel like electric snakes were wrapping around my limbs. The inflammation that came along with the summer days there would have me bedridden the majority of the time. I’ll admit it, (& I’m still kind of ashamed to) I was miserable for nearly a decade.

I tried my best. I found things to like about the west. The colder months were very good to me. When I look around here in Traverse City I often wonder where the mountains went. Those were beautiful majestic things that I never got tired of seeing. Again, I can’t explain it. I noticed when I’d visit Michigan & even when I spent some time in Florida in January, the neuropathy pain just wasn’t there. I don’t know what gives? & I also feel so good lately I’m kind of afraid to stop moving for fear that pain will return. Things aren’t perfect in this body of mine of course. I still have to be careful & maneuver around my big kidney & liver cysts, but that’s become second nature to me. I’ve been doing a lot so of course normal aches & pains occur as well.

When I say “a lot”, I really mean a lot. My husband is amazed. “I’m not used to you being so active…” “Are you sure you want to come along? It’s a far walk.” Yes, I want to. I want to walk. I want to be outside.

I still have my silly sun rash. When we first arrived, we spent a few days at the beach. I swam in Lake Michigan & loved watching the ducks. My photosensitive epilepsy isn’t something that’s going to go away either & the wonderful polymorphous light eruption that can often accompany people with photosensitivity is still a battle I have to fight. I don’t want to avoid the sun though. I’d rather bathe in aloe for a couple weeks after exposure, especially since the sun here doesn’t feel brutal & like it’s out to get me like it seemed to be in Las Vegas. It’s literally “an allergy to the sun”. But the good thing is that after the initial exposure, it may happen less & less & may just appear the next summer season after my first bout in the sunshine. Only time will tell. It’s something I noticed around five years ago & it would happen within five minutes of sun exposure & I was so weirded out by it. Now it’s fine. It’s not pretty to look at it, but things could be worse, right?

I really love Traverse City. I love that I live right on a lake & a trail, that the library is close by, that so many places are close by that I can walk to, that there is a free bus line always & that until Labor Day another line is free to ride. I love all the thrift stores. I love Downtown. I love being close to my family.

We had a good time at an event called Friday Night Live & saw this band called The Accidentals play. They’re amazing. When we first visited downtown I saw flyers everywhere for a free show they were having & I told Jackson “We’ll check them out when we get back to the hotel & see if we want to go to the show.” Well, I fell in love with their music & seeing them play live was totally awesome. I met them afterwards & had them sign my tote bag. They have a song called “Michigan & Again” & I don’t know…it feels like it was written for me. (I’m sure they’ve heard that a billion times as many artists have heard from fans billions of times. I know it’s not true, but wow…I couldn’t listen to it without tearing up for the longest time.)

I enjoyed the street sale as well. I got some cool vintage clothes & jewelry for real cheap. That Downtown area is just so cool. Lots of neat shops & places to eat. Now that I have my bike I can get down there more easily as well. I might even check out this poetry reading that happens monthly at a tea shop there.

On to the active stuff: I cannot believe how much I’ve been walking! Miles & miles of walking & it feels so good. My electric bike arrived yesterday & that was fun re-learning how to ride one. The bike is bigger than usual bikes so it’ll take some practice for me to maneuver it. I didn’t mess around with the motor though. I want to practice just riding before I try to figure that out. It was tough, but I rode about a mile. I’m a little wobbly, but I think I’ll get better. I’m also really afraid of going down the hills because going too fast makes me nervous. I’m going to wear my brakes down if I don’t get more brave! The hills aren’t very big I just get nervous about going fast. There’s always other bikers & walkers on the trail & I’m so terrified of hitting someone. I’ve gotta get over that though. I’m not interested in going the top speed of 20 mph that this bike can go if I use the throttle. I’m not in a hurry to get anywhere ever, but I’m eventually going to utilize the pedal assist so that I can go longer distances without getting too tired. It’s 4.5 miles around the Loop & I’m sure I can walk it, but I’d like to bike around it first. I’ve already walked a total of 5 miles in one day so I definitely know I can do it. There are plenty of resting spots along the way too. Jackson is waiting for his bike to arrive & then we can journey together.

Hanging out with my family has been so awesome. Jackson learned how to play that cornhole game that he’s only seen on TV until now. I also did pretty well playing Euchre for only the second time in my life. They have so many friends who are all just as cool as they are & it feels like having a big extended family when we hang out with them. That’s the biggest thing I love about Michigan that I’ve noticed after living in so many different places: the friendly, neighborly vibe that everyone has. I got so used to just walking around with my head down & avoiding eye contact with people after being my “Michigan self” & saying hi to everyone I passed in other places only to have them look at me like they couldn’t believe I was even talking to them, that when five people in a row said hi to me while I was walking the trail, I burst into tears saying “Everyone is so nice here!” I was overcome with emotion about everything for the first week here. I’d burst into tears over everything. Now I’m just back home & I feel more normal than I have in awhile. (Well, “normal” is subjective & not something I really believe in, but you know what I mean.) I just feel like I belong. It’s very, very good.

We still don’t have our belongings. The movers are taking their time for sure, but I’m thinking next week we can really start making this place our home. Thankfully, we rented a bed from Rent-a-Center because I was so tired of staying in hotels. Plus, why would we want to spend a month or more rent in a hotel? That’s just not in the budget. But we’re here & we love it. Jackson’s getting used to the bugs & I’m trying to be less afraid of spiders. Thankfully, I haven’t seen too too many of them. That’s one thing I liked about Vegas, the lack of bugs. The dinosaur size mosquitos here are something else. They don’t seem to swarm about like the little ones I met in Florida though.

This weekend we will be heading a little ways north to the Peshawbeston Powwow with my Uncle & Aunt. I’m so excited to be going to a powwow again & to see more of my family. It’ll be a good time, I’m sure. The weather should be clear too, if not a little too hot for my liking. I enjoyed hearing a soothing thunderstorm at 5am this morning. Our first day in the apartment, there was this really wicked five minute storm with strong winds & hail. It even knocked down a couple of trees in our apartment complex & took out the power for a couple of hours. It was so wild & so quick. That’s nature for you though, eh? It’s very, very nice to be so close to it again & to be able to explore it. I saw a really cool looking bird I found out was a grackle & that inspired me to get a book on MI birds so maybe I’ll become one of those “birder” people. 🙂

I see leaves already starting to fall & pretty soon those Autumn fire colors will be taking over & I cannot wait to see the changes that come with each season. As my title says, I’m in love with this place. It’s very, very good to be back home.

Photo by Jackson Patino of me looking over Lake Michigan