Scattered. Two ticks sideways.
Puff puff. Bloodstream hit.
with a neurotransmitter dam.
Pray for quickness. Center
hope on efficiency. A seizure
is a nuisance. Eyes of concern
pan over you. There lies
concern or fear of facing
the unwell. There is breath
control & then there is gasping
underwater although you
remain ashore.
Roaming where others
aren’t affected. Sounds
only your brain can hear
in a convoluted manner.
Siren song causing
a crash into the rocks.
A physical rattle.
One blink toward drowning.
The sea spits signals. Scrambled
neural messaging. You become
a spectacle no matter how much
you abhor the spotlight. Don the cloak
of embarrassment. Beg the legs
to run while rooted. Branches shake
in a temporal hurricane. Landfall.
Make landfall. Lose strength.
A week passes & you’re awake,
but feeling comatose. A sheer
veil, invisible, engulfs you.
Paralysis is a picky partner.
It dances between limbs, skin
sparking with no damp area
to quell any flames. Your body
is a forest fire. Erratic.
Out of control.
Hum the tune of the intractable.
Remember the bird calls
of Euphonia pulled through
the portal of that other place.
It’s psychedelia with a diagnosis.
Velcro cuffs tighten like finger traps
on tiny wrists. Darkling dreamers
tug your clothing. A safe cell
cannot exist here. Bid adieu to
all reason. Prepare for battle
with a form grown deaf
to its own frame.
Swell-swallowed, bomb-blasted,
flashes lacerate sparse air.
Find me, angel of deliverance.
Stop the siege. I am volt-ridden,
lightning struck, star-born. Fallen
to Earth with a brain on the outskirts.
Polarity driven. Compelled between
opposing forces. I was born
an eclipse. I am totality.
Soon, moon douses the sunlight.
For a brief moment winter is tasted
again. Reprieve between possessions.
Storm has ceased, now sleep.
Thunder crawls away echoing
through the cranial canyon. Rainfall
rapid eye movement. Lullaby
from the land of peace. Grace
sought you in the stream. Lifted
you from the fog’s grasp & all
is well again. All is well
until the next strike.
Photo by meo
Thistle Thoughts 
Jennifer, my skin started tingling while reading this, I’m sure a sympathetic visceral reaction to your words. I wish a way to make the strikes end would come to you as a merciful balm.
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Thank you. I appreciate that. 💜
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❤ You are welcome. I hate to say it's an excellent poem because it is based on your suffering, but it is.
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No, that’s totally ok. I try to alchemize all that nastiness into something else so I appreciate when people appreciate the work.
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❤
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such a beautifully evocative and vividly rich poem
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Thank you 💜
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Jenn, this feels so raw and real to me — like I’ve been pulled right into the storm with you.
The way your imagery shifts from “temporal hurricane” to “born an eclipse” seems to hold the whole cycle in just a few lines…
~David
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Thank you, David
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would you mind if I share this as a ‘reblog’ at some point in the future?
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Yes, that is fine. Thanks!
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Love the staccato style of this poem. That makes it hit harder home. There are so many good lines. You make the reader feel the suffering of your illness. Superb poem. Take care Jennifer!
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Thank you!
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Wow. Excellent piece.
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Thank you, Tara 💜
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It touched me deeply. Thank you for sharing it!
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Great work on this! Overall it’s excellent and there are some amazing segments that stand out as well. The ‘Paralysis is a picky partner’ segment and ‘I an volt-ridden’ and the last stanza in particular are wonderful. I love how it gives a sense of the abject experience of seizures but also is full of personal character that expresses all these feelings in the context of a sensitive person. It captures the uncanniness of being someone these unbelievable things happen to. It’s very communicative and that’s why you’re such a good poet.
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Thank you, Cypress!
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Chilling!!!! Your writing is just so amazing I got chills on my arms as I read.
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Thank you for reading. I wasn’t sure about this one but after a few edits, it felt right. ♥️
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Im happy you went with your gut after editing it .Then we all got to enjoy it!
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This is raw and painful to read. It captures an epileptic fit and all the suffering that comes with it. Here’s hoping you get better.
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Thank you, Nitin. I’ve been doing better epilepsy-wise, but my kidney troubles are causing me some grief. I’m alright though. Just have to take every day as it comes.
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